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I'm Heartbroken

I never wanted to date.
 
(Ashley writing)
 
Before I met Michael, I was lost.
 
Not that he saved me, but I felt alone.
 
Since I was a child, the one thing that I was clear on was that I wanted to be married one day.
 
I didn’t fantasize over wedding dresses.
 
I never thought about the perfect kiss or dance at my wedding.
 
I wanted MY person.
 
I fantasized about the little things…
 
The knowing glances.
 
Thoughtful post-it notes.
 
Laughing at the jokes that only we understand.
 
The electric charge that runs up my arm when he reaches out to hold my hand.
 
I daydreamed about these moments.
 
I imagined having kids and us smiling proudly while we watched their soccer games.
 
I imagined long walks on the beach, hand in hand.
 
I think it’s fair to say, I have always been a romantic.
 
I had a boyfriend in high school for 3.5 years.
 
Even at such a young age, I never wanted to date.
 
After high school, I had several other long term relationships.
 
Relationships were my thing.
 
I found a guy I liked and it would usually lead to a relationship….
 
AND then it would end either because I realized it wasn’t a fit or he decided I wasn’t a fit.
 
Either way, I hated it all.
 
I broke hearts and I got my heart broken more times than I can count.
 
It all sucked.
 
Before I met Michael, I felt so alone.
 
But, here’s the craziest part!
 
I am fortunate to have a very close family.
 
My parents have been married for 50 years this year!
 
My family has always supported me and we spend a lot of time together.
 
I have always had at least a couple of very close friends which is a feat because we have traveled and moved around a lot!
 
I am educated, smart, and have always been ambitious.
 
The other parts of my life have always been reasonably full.
 
Yet...I could be in a room full of people and even be talking to them (if you don’t know yet, I am a very chatty extrovert), but still feel alone.
 
I was embarrassed to tell anyone that.
 
I didn’t want to be seen as weak.
 
Frankly, I also didn’t want to hear other people’s opinions…and EVERYONE has one.
 
I didn’t want to hear that I didn’t “need” a man in my life.
 
I also didn’t want to hear “Why aren’t you married yet? You are such a catch!”
 
Most of all, I didn’t want to hear “Men are intimidated by you because you’re the kind of woman a man marries, not just dates.”
 
None of that was going to help me.
 
I just wanted to know that I could work a long day and come home to my person.
 
Simple.
 
Nothing big would have to happen.
 
We would talk about our day, laugh a bit, maybe cuddle up on the couch together or go for a walk.
 
Of course, there would be big moments too, but most of all I wanted these little moments.
 
I know there are millions of women out there who are just like me and feel the same way because I am fortunate to get to talk to quite a few every week.
 
What makes me heartbroken is that many of them feel just as lost and alone as I did before I met Michael.
 
With the way that dating is today, it's really hard to believe that you can have the kind of love that you want.
 
The reason why Michael and I do what we do is because want to empower women to know that they CAN have it all.
 
Being together has been a game changer for both of us personally and professionally.
 
We believe and have seen that anyone who is really committed to finding their person can do it.
 
Finding the kind of love you want can happen.
 
We’ve set aside some time this week to help you gain some hope and momentum in your love life.

First Take the Love Life Assessment. We’ll identify what’s getting in the way of your success in love and if it's a fit map out a plan for you to meet the man you want.

Take the Assessment here: http://lovelifeassessment.com

 
Chat soon,
 
Ashley

 

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