What makes a man want to commit to the right woman?
The number one thing we hear from women every single day is that they only meet men who are NOT looking for the one thing they want---a committed relationship.
These men usually want to date “casually”, when things are convenient for them, no strings attached.
Here is the biggest problem, often times things with this kind of man are HOT.
When you are with him, you feel chemistry, connection, and like the most important thing in his world.
Then when you two part…...crickets.
Sometimes you won’t even hear from him for days or weeks, but you hang on to hope that he will realize you are the best thing that ever happened to him.
Other men get in touch with you, but not of them feel quite as exciting as the commitment phobe.
You tell yourself that a great guy is worth waiting for, don’t give them a chance, and then constantly check your phone to see if Crazy Chemistry guy has come to his senses yet.
The worst part….it will eventually end.
EVEN if he breadcrumbs you for months or years.
It will end.
You will feel heartbroken, disappointed, and even down right pissed off that you have to start over again and that you have wasted your time on yet ANOTHER jerk who just wants to plays games and is selfish.
So, what makes the guy you really want walk away from you and marry the next girl he meets?
What is the difference between you and her?
She leaves him wanting more.
She knows that a relationship isn’t exclusive, until it’s exclusive.
That means that there has been a conversation where you both commit to each other.
That means that if he doesn’t make plans with you, you continue dating other people.
That means that you make sure that you lay out your winning blueprint and don’t have agree to have a casual relationship with him that is one sided.
He has to be able to envision a future with you to want to commit.
The best way to do that is to know what you want and need in a partner, as well as what you can offer.
The key is being able to express this to your man authentically and warmly.
Then receive his efforts in a way that will validate and accept him as a person.
As professional women, we often feel uncomfortable telling a man what we want and need because there is a stigma that if you do this it will be too intimidating, demanding, or unattractive.
The truth is, if you DON’T do this you will likely end up in a relationship where you are unfulfilled and unhappy long term.
These relationships always end and usually they end in painful, expensive, messy, and exhausting divorces.
No matter how hard you “try” to create the relationship you have always wanted, if you aren’t committed, you will stay single.
The difference between dreaming and actually having the relationship you want is not about how much action you take, it is about how committed you are.
There will always be a reason (which is really an excuse in disguise) as to why now is not the right time to make a relationship a priority.
Until you truly commit to your dream and get the guidance and help you need to get out of the patterns that are keeping you from it, the right man won’t be ready to commit to you.
Rooting for you,
Dr. Michael Arn
The Crucial Habits Experience with Dr. Ashley & Dr. Michael Arn helps you create Success, Happiness & Love in your life.
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